As reported yesterday on DamascusDispatch.com San Francisco had a plan to deploy Roomba’s to clean up the streets of San Francisco. That plan was scrapped when the SF Board of Supervisors blew the entire budget on killer robots. Due to public backlash, the board has since reversed its decision to purchase killer robots, and the street cleaning effort is back on the table. Michael Douglas, co-star of a popular ’70s TV crime drama was elated. “Carl Mauldin, God rest his sole, would be so proud to see these efforts to keep San Francisco’s streets clean.”
President of the board, Shamann Walton, stated, “Making San Francisco a desirable travel destination will bolster the tourist industry, which has taken a significant hit since the COVID pandemic. This will result in an explosion of high paying employment opportunities for people of color and other marginalized groups. As they say at Roomba, let robots do the dirty work.” Mayor London Breed also weighed in on the decision. “The homeless, many of whom are out of work hospitality workers, will see the greatest benefit of this plan. Reinvigorating tourism will get these people back to work and off the streets.”
A spokesman from iRobot, the manufacturer of Roomba, was elated at the news. “This decision brings much needed revenue to our struggling business. And our software engineering team are excited at the challenge of developing AI that can accurately identify and manage peoples poop piles.”
Members of the local 666 Suicide Bombers Union, who protested earlier this week, could not be reached for comment.