On Saturday Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau authorized the downing of an unidentified aerial craft. The only problem: gun bans in Canada prevent the Royal Canadian Air Force (RCAF) from carrying live weapons. Below is the transcript between the Prime minister, Justin Trudeau, and the unarmed Canadian jet fighter pilot, Lt. Nick Tamère’.
Trudeau: “Good day young fighter pilot. With whom do I have the pleasure speaking?”
Pilot: “Uh, Good morning Sir. This is Lieutenant Nick Tamère’ of the Royal Canadian Air Force.”
Trudeau: “I thought you guys all had cool pilot call signs”
Pilot: “Yes sir. You can call me Frenchie”
Trudeau: “Ha! Aren’t French fighter pilots essentially useless?”
Pilot: “Exactly sir. Rock the casbah.”
Trudeau: “OK, whatever. Can you see this flying object?”
Pilot: “Yes sir. It’s cylindrical and about the size of a Prevost Motor Coach.”
Trudeau: “Hmmmmm. Do you think we should shoot it down?”
Pilot: “Roger that. I think it’s a good idea.”
Trudeau: “OK. I order you to shoot it down.”
Pilot: “Ummmmmmm, Sir?”
Trudeau: “Go ahead Frenchie.”
Pilot: “Ummm. I can’t shoot it down.”
Trudeau: “Why not? Are you a conscientious objector?”
Pilot: “No sir. I have no bullets.”
Trudeau: “What?”
Pilot: “Remember, you outlawed all guns?”
Trudeau: “But the government gets to have guns.”
Pilot: “Apparently that wasn’t specified when you outlawed them”
Trudeau: “It’s just as well. How ’bout you shoot a missile at it?”
Pilot: “Sorry sir. We can’t afford missiles.”
Trudeau: “Can you just run into it or something?”
Pilot: “Sir, I’m not a Kamikaze pilot.”
Trudeau: “Would have been more useful than a French pilot.”
Pilot: “Hey, that’s not fair. True, but not fair.”
Trudeau: “OK. I’ll call the Americans to see if they’ll shoot it down for us.”
Pilot: “Roger, I’ll keep up with it until they get here.”
A few minutes later we hear Trudeau on the radio again, “Hey Frenchie. Bogies at six o’clock”
Pilot: “What the F@&!”
Trudeau: “Just kidding. I always wanted to say that. The Americans are right behind you”
Pilot: “Oh, OK. I’ll pull over” A minute later we hear a loud bang and then the pilot on the radio again. “Dang that was cool!”
Trudeau: “Did he hit it?”
Pilot: “Yes sir. A direct hit. We should really get some bullets in these things. That looked fun.”
Trudeau: “Nah. We’ll leave that to the Americans. American pilots would never shoot me.”
Pilot: “Roger that!”