Allison Transmission (ALSN) has announced that they will be rebranding after the Bud Light debacle. Executives of the company fear that consumers may be confused by their use of the phrase “trans” in transmission. An unnamed source within the company stated, “we just can’t have one of these situations on our hands. We know our primary consumer base are tired of all the trans-activism going on in corporate America today. After Allison Transmission rebrands, our company will be known as Allison Conveyance. All products formerly referred to as transmissions will be marketed as conveyance machines.”
According to Sustainalytics, Allison is in the high-risk group with respect to environmental social and governance (ESG) sustainability. This move, which clearly distances them from the lgbTq÷n community, will most likely elevate them to a “severe” rating. Investors interested in transforming the planet into a universal safe space are advised not to invest in companies at this end of the ESG scale. Only time will tell if rebranding will have any effect, negative or positive. While Bud Light drinkers have vowed never to buy an Allison product again, there is no evidence that current Bud Light drinkers have ever bought any in the past.
Bubba Joe Gandee who owns and operates Haggai Automotive & Diesel Repair in Greeleyville, South Carolina was unimpressed by the move. “I don’t give a $h!t what they call them. If it gets power from the engine to the wheels, I’ll buy a million of them.” Similar comments can be heard from any diesel gearhead.