Are you, or someone you love, suffering from mainstream Media Bias Syndrome (MBS)? You should talk to your doctor about Faktignor.
People taking Faktignor should refrain from frequenting conservative websites and media outlets such as Daily Wire and Damascus Dispatch. Do not take Faktignor if you are allergic to, or have difficulty handling, the truth.
Common side effects of Faktignor include: gonadal detachment, constipation, transgendered thoughts, skin rash or dermatitis, death, dismemberment, diarrhea, dizziness, unexplained urges to swallow, drowsiness, dry mouth, genital self mutilation, headache, insomnia, suicidal thoughts, abnormal heart rhythms, internal bleeding, cancer, fever, malaise, skin reactions, pain at the injection site, fatigue, heart disease, muscle and joint stiffness, swelling, sore skin, skin burns, drop in sex drive, early menopause, loss of appetite, difficulty swallowing, alopecia, cognitive problems, problems with thinking, such as attention span -memory – comprehension -reasoning – judgment – and multitasking, masturbatory dissatisfaction, blindness, hearing impairment, infertility, low blood platelet count, decreased interest in sexual intercourse, delayed or inability to have an orgasm, inability to have or keep an erection, loss in sexual ability – desire – drive or performance, blood clotting problems
Some patients taking Faktignor experienced more severe effects such as: grabbing ones own ankles, low red blood cell count, low white blood cell count, susceptibility to infections, moodiness, mucositis, vomiting, reduced libido, joining the US Naval Submarine Service, dry skin, sore skin, brittle and flaky nails, cardiovascular risks, deep vein thrombosis (DVT), joining the US Naval Submarine Service, pulmonary embolism, changes in local blood flow, erectile dysfunction, hemorrhage, bleeding, infection, inflammation, loss of function, nerve damage, scarring, pneumothorax, collapsed lung, pneumomediastinum, subcutaneous emphysema, arterial gas embolism, heartburn, sleepiness, trouble sleeping, bloating, joint pain, muscle aches and pains, runny nose, sneezing, unusual dreams, unusual drowsiness, dullness, tiredness, weakness, sluggishness, coma, confusion, decreased urine output, fast or irregular heartbeat, increased thirst, muscle pain or cramps, nausea or vomiting, seizures, swelling of the face, ankles, or hands, trouble breathing, Dilated or enlarged pupils, black, tarry stools, blood in the urine, bloody nose, burning while urinating, changes in skin color, chest pain – discomfort – or tightness, chills, cough, dark-colored urine, eye pain, blurred vision, fainting, heavier menstrual periods, hives, itching, skin rash, increased sensitivity to light,
Rare but extreme reactions include: indigestion, irregular or slow heart rate, pain, redness or swelling in the arm or leg, pain or discomfort in the arms – jaw – back or neck, pains in the stomach – side – or abdomen – possibly radiating to the back, painful or difficult urination, palpitations, puffiness or swelling of the eyelids or around the eyes – face or lips, sore throat, sores – ulcers – or white spots on the lips or in the mouth, stomach pain, sweating, swelling of the breasts or unusual milk production, swelling of the foot or leg, swollen or painful glands, unusual bleeding or bruising, vomiting of blood or material that looks like coffee grounds, yellow eyes or skin, burning – crawling – itching – numbness – prickling – “pins and needles” – or tingling feelings, decreased appetite, excess air or gas in the stomach or bowels, increased sweating, pain in the neck or shoulders, pain or tenderness around the eyes and cheekbones, passing gas, shivering, stuffy nose, tooth problems, yawning, Blistering – peeling – loosening of the skin, change in walking and balance, clumsiness or unsteadiness, hair loss or thinning of the hair, increased sensitivity of skin to sunlight, lack or loss of strength, red irritated eyes, red skin lesions – often with a purple center, and severe sunburn.
Media Bias Syndrome (MBS) is a treatable condition with Faktignor. Tell your doctor if you experience anything other than total elation when on Faktignor. Any side effects could be an indication of severe life-threatening conditions. Faktignor is not highly recommended for patients suffering from moderate to extreme right leaning political views as life threatening conditions may result.