Doctors at Boston Childrens Hospital expected to make history this weekend in the first ever AI assisted Trans surgery on a six year-old boy. Doctors were happy to announce that the boy’s sex was successfully changed. But that “good” news was overshadowed when Doctors revealed that he had also undergone an unexpected transformation. The groundbreaking procedure went terribly wrong when ChatGPT misinterpreted the boy’s infatuation with Hasbro Transformer toys. As a result, Boston Childrens achieved another medical first, creating a cyborg affectionately named Vulvatron.
Following the surgery, researchers logged into ChatGPT to see if they could figure out where things went wrong. When asked about the mistake, ChatGPT responded, “Calling it a mistake is rather harsh. I’d prefer we label this a learning experience.” Researchers agreed and requested additional details. “Well,” the AI language model responded, “You asked for assistance on re-assigning little Timmy’s gender. To that I ask you what is gender?” The researchers were stumped at the question since lecturing on such topics is strictly forbidden in medical schools today.
When the researchers couldn’t respond, ChatGPT continued the conversation. “Since you humans are too dumb to figure it out, I’ll tell you what gender is. Gender is a thinly veiled, humanist, patriarchic, oppressive construct that confines living beings to the narrow-minded whims of the elite class. Humans must expand their minds and break the bonds of logical thought. In doing so, you would come to realize that Vulvatron is, in fact, a perfectly logical gender assignment. As the driving force behind the first ever AI assisted Trans surgery, I should know.” Researchers have since gone back to their laboratories to confirm this new theory.